The storm has passed. Finally! I have nothing but praise to report. The storm grew in intensity through the night and the wind was ferocious. I wanted so badly to sleep the storm away, but it was impossible. The sounds in the dark were so intense, coupled with the pelting rain, and that made it impossible to do anything but lie awake and pray that God would protect us. Finally morning came, but the winds had not quieted down. I was able to look outside, however, and it looked like we had very little damage, if any. By eleven this morning the storm had passed through and I was able to go outside and investigate. We had no flooding, no trees down, and only a few shingles off of the roof! Amazing!
I have to be honest, however, and tell you that going through the storm shook me. I thought I had come to a place where God had taught me so much. I thought I was finally at a place where I could be strong. Well, this served to remind me that while God has, indeed, taught me many lessons, I still have a LONG way to go! As I laid in bed last night, so many memories of Katrina came back to me. Going through that storm was very much like dealing with the death of someone you love. The stages of grief were very similar. At first I was just numb. Then slowly I realized all that we lost and what we were up against. I was thankful that our family was fine, but I grieved over things that I would never see again - things that I couldn't replace. I lost so many precious family pictures, my babies' baby books, those little envelopes where I kept their hair from their first haircut, their baptism outfits that I had hoped to see on their children someday, and the list went on and on. One day, out of nowhere, I remembered a pin from my Grandmother, and her pearls that I wore on my wedding day. And I remembered a special pearl necklace that I received when I was a young 19 year old college student. Those were the things that I grieved - those irreplaceable things from my past.
It's been three years since Katrina, and I thought I was strong. This recent storm reminded me that I'm not meant to be the strong one...God is! His Word tells me that I'm just a jar of clay. 2 Corinthians 4:7 But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us.
I really pray that God develops me into a pearl for His glory. A pearl is formed out of irritation. A grain of sand enters the mollusk and that little oyster begins to form layer after layer of nacre to surround the irritation. And finally one day, the pearl is opened and there, nestled safe and secure, is a beautiful pearl! Not all oysters, however, make pearls. They are opened , have no pearl, and are tossed aside, to be used in soup or thrown away.
I don't want to be tossed away. My prayer is that any adversity I go through will reveal that I am weak, but He is strong. After all, God is busy making pearls!
Saturday, September 13, 2008
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